I didnt write a therapy blog last nite...im not sure why but i was kind of down and didnt feel like posting..i dont feel like posting today either but if i dont..i wont get better so here goes my ill fated affair with henly..
memorial day of 01..danny and my best friend came by because it was tradittional for me to have a cookout on that day and he knew it..we had a chance to talk that day..and he asked me out so we could talk about danny and of course i said yes..henly and i started going out and ended up moving in together...we had a beautiful condo in darien and everything was great..til we had a fight in march of 04 and henly left and i didnt hear from him for 9 months..on christmas nite my phone rang as i was getting ready for bed..it was henly..he missed me..he loved me and asked if he could come home..i got dressed and drove to his brothers where he was staying and we talked all nite..we worked it out and he came home with me...in january of 05..he asked me to move south with him and start our lives fresh and i agreed..i got on the internet and found us a small place to live and on february 1st..of 05..we headed for southern illinois..i was so happy..our lives were going great..we both got jobs and settled into our new life comfortably... until march 31 of 07..henly wrecked his car out by work..and it was totaled and he didnt know what he was going to do...well henly was raised down here so he had lots of friends in the area and luckily 2 of his best freinds..a couple named bobby and pam..lived right by his job and offered him a place to stay so he could work til he got another car..i missed him but i thought they were wonderful to help him like that..but the months went by and finally it was august and still no car..on august 21st..henly called me at work and asked to borrow some money to put gas in pams car..because she was helping him find a better job..well he always paid me back so i told him to come by my office and i would give him the money...henly came by my work that afternoon and picked up the money and told me he missed me and would try to be home soon..after work, i went home and was surprised that henly didnt call me before bed like he ussually did...(silly as it sounds..he liked me to sing "rockabye henly" as if he were a child)..lol but i didnt worry..i got up the next morning and went to work...i was really busy doing inventory in the warehouse when my boss came and told me..henlys aunt was in front and needed to talk to me..i knew something was wrong then but never imagined how bad it was...she told me that henly had dropped dead with an anerisim...with no warning and it happened as soon as he left my office after picking up the money yesterday....i lost it...his aunt took me home and felt i should hear the details of what happened..it seems the money he got from me was so him and pam could get a hotel room and dope...he died in bed with his best friends wife....two blocks from where i work..i still cant ride past the benton motel without my stomach churning...i guess i wasent as special as i thought i was because he ws the second man of mine that died..this time i was on suicide watch...and my son moved in to take care of me..my daughter talked me into getting on ixen and there i met two guys that helped me want to live..one is my rock n soul mate and one is my boyfriend now...so you will here about both of them beacuse they both deserve a blog....so i will be back tomorrow with my blog about my boyfriend first...and it, like the other two is also ill fated...if anyone should find these blogs....thank you for reading them...Linda
hope you are getting better by blogging your innermost feelings linda and telling your story..im sorry i cant help you anymore with your recovery from this dark cloud, its down to you now to get stronger and re-build your life , you're doing a great job here on your blog and you know im always around like your guardian angel and you also know im praying you make a speedy recovery...god bless Rich :-)
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